no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
