I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Randomize
