google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Randomize
