In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize