i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
