there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
there is puke in my bra ... again
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
