worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
operation harelip BJ is a go
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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