I'm eating all of the evidence.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I just had sex on a roof
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Randomize