I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
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