it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
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