My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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