I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
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