I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
