Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Randomize
