TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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