Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
my shit smells like andre
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
