i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
how does that bad decision feel?
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
