Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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