So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
