her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Randomize
