just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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