so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Randomize