I am puke
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
