i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
