Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I believe in your delicious
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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