office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
