id be glad to
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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