I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
my liver is dry heaving
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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