Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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