I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
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