No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
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