i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
