Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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