yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Randomize
