I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
