Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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