she sounds like chewbacca in bed
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
