I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
