so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
