Come see our sink grown plant.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
