I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Randomize