I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize