Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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