After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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