I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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