she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
