just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Randomize