...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
