oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
