Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
