Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
The Olympian is in my bed
Randomize
